c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!l1Tell us, how does it feel?
c2c1l1You know, no two ways about it.  All those hours of pumpingl1iron really paid off.
c2c1l1I mean, seriously, look at me, my arms are so thick, Il1can't even scratch my own back!
c2c1l1But, I mean, that's what tree bark's for, right?
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Errr...sure, why not.l1So, what does the future hold for you now that you'vel1conquered the boxing world?
c2c1l1Well, to be honest, the belt's nice, but the cash isl1what really interests me.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Of course!  Cars, mansions, jets, it's a great lifestyle.
c2c1l1Sure, that stuff's nice.  But what I'm really interestedl1in is a really big backscratcher!
c2c1l1I can't describe in words how bad my back itches...
 
 
 
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!
c2c1l1Well, it's no real surprise to me.  You know what I'ml1saying?
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Honestly, no, I can't say I do.
c2c1l1I look out at the boxing world right now, and seel1nothing but B-class fighters.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Really?  I watched some tapes of your previous fights,l1and it looked like you took some hard punches.
c2c1l1Hard punches?  Maybe for a normal man, but for al1champ like me, they were little more thanl1mosquito stings.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Sounds like you have a chin of iron!
c2c1l1That goes a long way.  But it also has a lot tol1do with my training regimen.
c2c1l1I spend two hours every day punching my own face.l1I've gotten to the point where my face's painl1sensors barely register a truck collision.
c2c1l1Trust me, I know.  I've tried it.
c2c1l1On top of that, I psycho train consantly, eat right,l1...oh, and pain killers.  I take a lot of pain killers.
c2c1l1Numer one, baby!  Number one!
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!l1Tell us, how does it feel?
c2c1l1It feels like I finally got what I had coming tol1me.  My ship has arrived!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Yes, I heard the prize money was high forl1this fight.
c2c1l1Prize money?  That was a handout.  I'm thinkingl1of going global with this thing!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Eh...I'm not sure I follow.
c2c1l1My name's a brand now.  Why should I limit myselfl1to boxing?  I'm thinking toasters, grills, washingl1machines, the works!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1I suppose it could work.  But, it soundsl1like a big undertaking.
c2c1l1Oh, it is.  That's why my team's already beenl1working on some of the basic concepts.
c2c1l1And for my part, I've been studying mandarin.l1Did you know mandarin is going to become the secondl1biggest language in the world?
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Yes, I heard something about that.
c2c1l1Koh-ni-chi-wah sucka.l1And Ah-re-gate-o to all my homies!
 
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!
c2c1l1I wanna take this opportunity to give my side ofl1the story on all the allegations that have beenl1flying around about me.
c2c1l1First and foremost, that wasn't my truck theyl1found.  It looks kinda like mine, but it ain't.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Well, I'm sure the truth will come out andl1your name will be cleared of all charges.
c2c1l1They'd better.  I'm paying the judge good money,l1he'd better pull through.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Well, any plans for the immediate future, nowl1that you're the World Champ?
c2c1l1Absolutely.  I'm going to use my new massivel1popularity and sway over the common man to makel1a move into the political ring.
c2c1l1You're thinking of making a move to politics?
c2c1l1I've got it all figured out.  The problem withl1the government is that stuff keeps getting stuckl1in deadlocks.
c2c1l1Under my administration, that would be a thing ofl1the past.  See, whenever there's a disagreement,l1we get the two opposing sides to fight.
c2c1l1The last man standing gets to have his way on thel1issue.  It makes sense, and, hey, it works forl1orangutans.
 
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!l1Tell us, how does it feel?
c2c1l1It feels groovy, man!  Real groovy!  I canl1dig it, my man!  Waaooh!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1So, any plans for the immediate future?
c2c1l1Definitely.  I'm thinking of starting myl1own band.  Yeeeeaowh!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Wow!  That sounds impressive.  So, are you going to be the lead singer?
c2c1l1Well, I won't deny it, that was my originall1plan.  Wooop!  Unfortunately, my singing sounds notl1unlike a dying alley cat.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Ouch!  I can see how that would bel1a problem.
c2c1l1So, right now, we're thinking I'm going tol1be the lead drummer.
c2c1l1And I'm okay with that, you know.  I mean,l1I've spent most of my life beating the crap out ofl1stuff, why not a drum?
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Well, it certainly sounds like we'll bel1seing a lot more of you in the future.
c2c1l1Absolutely.  And finally, let me take thisl1opportunity to be serious for a moment and say...
c2c1l1Yeeeep!  Yeeeep!  Yeeeaowh!
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!l1Tell us, how does it feel?
c2c1l1I feel neither pride nor joy.  It is as itl1was meant to be.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1You certainly sound very calm, consideringl1the amazing feat you've achieved.
c2c1l1Amazing?  Well, perhaps it appears that way.l1But the result was quite obvious to anyl1student of box-jitsu.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Box-jitsu?  I have to admit, I'm notl1entirely sure what that is.
c2c1l1Then I will explain.  Box-jitsu is thel1ultimate merging of boxing and the ancientl1asian martial arts.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1It certainly sounds powerful.
c2c1l1It is the ultimate martial art.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Yes, I think I heard you were openingl1a gym somewhere in the city?
c2c1l1That's right.  I'll be opening a box-jitsul1exclusive dojo right here.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1I'm not sure I have the directions.
c2c1l1It's on the corner of Fifth and Central, rightl1next to the pizza joint.
c2c1l1Only those whose wills are strong enough tol1resist the temptating smell of oven freshl1pizza are worthy of box-jitsu.  Wadooo!
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!l1Tell us, how does it feel?
c2c1l1To be honest, it feels like a huge weight hasl1been lifted off my shoulders.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Really?  It doesn't sound like you enjoyl1being the ultimate champ?
c2c1l1Oh no, don't get me wrong.  Being the champl1is great.  I'm just relieved I don't have tol1do it over again.
c2c1l1I don't know what it is with this current cropl1of boxers, but I got hit below the belt sol1many times, I can't even count them.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Yes, I heard something about you filing anl1official complaint.
c2c1l1That's right, I did.  I'm still waiting forl1the results on that.  Let's see if they don'tl1go for a legal low-blow as well!
c2c1l1A few months ago, I had this big scare, wherel1my doctor was telling me I couldn't have kidsl1any more.
c2c1l1Luckily, it turned out to be a false alarm.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1So, I assume you'll use your new leverage tol1change the regulations on low blows?
c2c1l1Absoultely.  From now on, anyone who goes forl1a lowblow, has to take three in return!
c2c1l1That'll remedy the situation real quick!
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!l1Tell us, how does it feel?
c2c1l1It feels like I'm on top of the world!  But,l1at the same time, it's a hollow victory.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1What makes you say that?
c2c1l1Well, I mean, let's face it.  The currentl1boxers out there, they're all geezers.l1Yesterday's champions.
c2c1l1Me, I'm the future of boxing.  Fast, agile,l1and I hit like a brick wall.  I'm the completel1package.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1So you never felt like you were challenged?
c2c1l1Are you kidding?  Half the time, I felt I wasl1hitting my grandfather!
c2c1l1The only reason some of those fights didn'tl1go so well was because I was really holdingl1back.
c2c1l1I was sure if I went all out, I'd getl1arrested for physical abuse of an elderly person!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1So what changes would you like to see inl1the boxing scene?
c2c1l1I say we get the old timers out of thel1ring.  The closest they'll ever get to a beltl1is carrying mine for me!
 
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion!
c2c1l1This victory goes way back to when I firstl1went into boxing to prove the validity of myl1fight equation.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Your fight equation?
c2c1l1That's right.  You see, all problems can bel1broken down to basic mathematical problems.
c2c1l1So, I figured if I could solve the equationl1for being a great fighter, I could become al1world champion!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1I assume you figured the equation out, andl1that's led you to where you are now.
c2c1l1That's exactly what happened.  It wasl1mathematically impossible for me to lose!
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1That equation sound amazing?  Any chancel1we'll ever get to see it?
c2c1l1I'm publishing a book next month that'lll1go into detail about the equation.
c2c1l1It's quite simply, really.  A few crossl1products, take the outcome through Carmack'sl1Reverse.  That kind of thing.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Sounds snazzy.  And what about you?l1Any immediate plans?
c2c1l1I'm going to take my winnings and fund myl1research on creating the perfect eggroll!
 
 
 
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Congratulations ,l1You've finally become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the World!
c2c1l1I always knew I had it in me!
c2c1l1My life's been like a big easter egg hunt,l1but with belts instead of eggs, and facesl1instead of grass.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1How'd you do it?
c2c1l1Well, I can't really attribute it to any onel1thing.  I've got an excellent staff behind me.
c2c1l1My life motto was also a big help.l1Steady and even always wins in the end.l1Minty fresh breath certainly helped.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1If you had to pick one defining aspect thatl1helped you become the champ, what would it be?
c2c1l1Hmmm, I'd have to say my previous job as al1secret service agent.
c2c1l1I beat a lot of people's faces in back then.l1It proved to be invaluable experience forl1the ring.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Any immediate plans for the future?
c2c1l1Well, the feeling of peoples's skulls crushingl1under your fists gets pretty old after a while.
c2c1l1I'm thinking of going into racing.
c2ANNOUNCERc1l1Wow!  Stock cars or F-1?
c2c1l1Neither.  I'm thinking Golf Cart.
 
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